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Makin’ Bacon

It bothers me a bit when you come across those articles online. You know, the ones that explain how you’re been doing something wrong your entire life. Things you think you know how to do. Like frying bacon.

I came across an article from a chef who used to work for the queen. He fried the royal bacon on a regular basis and claims most of us do it wrong. According to this chef, we need a medium to hot pan, then you just cook your bacon for about a minute on each side. That way it gets crisp on the edges and the fat renders without dissolving.

I don’t know about you, but my bacon doesn’t come with one of those little “by appointment to her Majesty the Queen” logos on it. How long you cook your bacon could depend on who was operating the slicing machine that day. I’ve had bacon you could read a book through it was so thin. I’ve also had nice think chunky bacon. Sometimes in the same package. Often because the variety of bacon I purchase could depend on what’s on sale that day.

And the amount of fat that needs to be rendered can vary greatly. Some times it depends on how well they can hide it beneath the packaging.

And bacon is one of those things that depends on how you like it. I like it crisp. Well done, even. Some might even call it burnt. There are others in the family who like bacon less than well done. What I would call barely cooked.

The cooking of bacon is one of those things that can cause great debate in my house. Although it’s bacon, so people tend to eat it no matter what its state of doneness. That state of doneness can depend on who is doing the cooking.

If I was cooking for the Queen, this might be a matter of concern. She’s the Queen. I’m pretty sure she gets her bacon exactly the way she likes it. I highly doubt her chef would tell her it’s wrong. Unless he had another job lined up.

He may think he knows the proper way to fry bacon, but around my place that decision belongs to whoever is standing at the stove. And since the Queen is not sitting at the table, she doesn’t get a say.

Although he does say condiments like ketchup do not need to be used on bacon. I’ll agree with him on that.

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Bridgewater, CA
5:20 am, Apr 21, 2026
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